Yes, I have a sister...

Not many people know this, but I do have a sister, and her name is Jeanie Ortis.

No, she's not really my sister by blood but I can't imagine being actually related would make it a whole lot different.  To give you an idea how long Jeanie has been a part of my life... well, truth be told I can't remember a time where Jeanie wasn't around.  She simply has always just "been". In other words I've known Jeanie forever!

 If you can think of all the things kids do growing up, Jeanie and I did them. Selling lemonade by the side of the road for 10 cents a glass?  Did it. Building snow forts?  Did it.  Playing for hours outside 'til our folks called us in for the night? Did it. Putting on puppet shows for grown ups pretending to be entertained?  Did it. Mixing dirt and water in a "Freezie wrapper" and selling it to a kid as a chocolate flavoured Popsicle?  Sadly, we did that too.

If my Parents went out of town without me I would stay over at the Ortis house. It was always exciting for me as I got to eat Mrs. Ortis' great food, learn how to play Pool from Mr. Ortis, and most exciting of all I got to hang out with Jeanie and her older sister Cindy. I really felt I was with my "other" family during those times. There was plenty of fun, laughs and Punchanella Ice Cream at the Ortis household.  What is Punchanella Ice Cream I hear you ask?  I don't really have a good story here... I simply called Neapolitan Ice Cream "Punchanella" one day, and it stuck.  And yes, to this day even Jeanie calls it Punchanella Ice Cream.

I wish I could say it was always fun and laughs when I stayed at the Ortis household but there was one horrific incident I would be remiss not to bring up.  One night after supper Jeanie, myself and Cindy were sitting around the dinner table chatting (Where Mr. and Mrs. Ortis were escapes my memory) everything was fine until Cindy inexplicably grabbed the biggest, greenest, most horrible looking pea I had ever seen and shoved it up her nose!!!!  Yes, as god as my witness, she shoved the ENTIRE pea UP HER NOSE!!!!  It was a sickly green globe pulsating in her nostril and seemed to make Cindy turn into some sort of possessed monster that proceeded to chase us around the dinner table!!!!  We ran in horror as all sense of reason seemed to leave Cindy!  And let me be clear here... she chased us WITH A PEA UP HER NOSE!!!! It seemed to last forever but eventually she stopped chasing us.  It took many years of therapy and counseling for Jeanie and I, but we have since been able to enjoy dinner with each other once again without fear of being chased by Cindy with a pea up her nose.  For the record, Cindy will deny this story... but it happened.  I was there.

Fast forward many years, Jeanie and I are MUCH older, and she is getting married this week to a New Zealander named Eddie Pye. Eddie is a modern day renaissance man. He is an artist, a teacher, and a philosopher. Eddie writes long thought provoking pieces on the existence of the soul... whereas I call Neapolitan Ice Cream "Punchanella".  Normally when a fiance is brought into a tight circle of family and friends it can be a little awkward for everyone as you feel them out and see what they are like.  I can safely say Eddie was a member of the family pretty much 5 minutes after everyone met him. So not only has Eddie got the wonderful Ortis family as part of his life, he now has a taller brother with the last name Anderson too (Whether he likes it or not). He's a wonderful guy... I would do anything for him. I couldn't be happier that they have both found each other and that I get to create new memories with the both of them.

And speaking of memories... since Jeanie is getting married I've been trying the last couple of days to express the proper feeling these memories of Jeanie seem to bring out in me. Is it nostalgia, longing for the past, or are they just amusing? I tried to organize them in my head and thought about the little "in jokes" we had together like...

"Ummmmmm I'm telling" (said when we saw the older kids doing something bad)

or

"Let's play Fambily" (Yes that's FamBily with a B and a regular request from either Jeanie or myself when we played as kids)

 I also thought about all of our Anderson/Ortis family trips to Spokane Washington when we stayed at the "Trade Winds" and how much I still cherish those trips.  I thought about Jeanie wearing her Holly Hobby outfit on her first day to school, and about the scary day Jeanie fell down the hill by my Grandma's house on her bike. I remember Jeanie being at the hospital lending her support when my Dad fell seriously ill in 2004 and how much strength she gave me in those unpleasant times. When I think of Jeanie I always remember her dog Patches, and the house they used to have across the street from ours, and then those thoughts eventually drift to her wonderful Grandparents the Bruce's. The memories really trail on for quite some time and I can't possibly mention them all but mainly I remember Jeanie making me laugh, and how she was always willing to listen to me. When I think of all these things it's kind of like a mural of memories painted on a wall and when I look at it I realize it made me feel one simple thing ... love.

I love my sister Jeanie Ortis.

That's what it all boils down to, and I can't wait to add more memories as Jeanie and Eddie start their life together...  all that said, I could do without someone ever chasing me with a pea up their nose again.

On meeting Billy Bragg and losing my cool...

Those of you who really know me, know two things...
One, is that I find pants horribly restricting. The other, is that I have a huge admiration for singer songwriter Billy Bragg. Most people I talk to eventually ask me what kind of music I listen to, and when I say Billy Bragg some look at me blankly "He isn't played on my local morning top 40 radio show", some show slight recognition "He's British right?", and some look at me with great admiration and smile "Ohhhh you're much smarter than you look!".  For the uninitiated Billy Bragg is an artist with a political leaning, but he is sooo much more musically than a protest tune, because Billy can break out the most beautiful love song you've ever heard. He's easily in my top five musical acts, right up there with The Beatles, Ben Folds, Simon and Garfunkel, and The Who.

So, now you know about my love for all things Billy... let me tell you about how I got to meet the man and completely wound up making an ass of myself.

For whatever reason Billy decided to play a gig in the sleepy town of Nelson, BC last month during his latest tour for his new Album "Tooth and Nail".  I have no idea why he came to Nelson, as he usually only plays larger venues in places like Seattle and Vancouver, places befitting a man of his musical stature.  But I wasn't going to question it, I was simply going to go to it! I got my brother Sean,a fellow Bragg fan, a ticket and on April 06 we were making the ninety minute trek from Grand Forks to Nelson.

Billy Live at The Royal in Nelson, BC 04/06/13

Now I've seen Billy Bragg three previous times, all in Vancouver and all with my best friend Mike Ciccone (a review of one show can be read here where the reviewer clearly complains about having to stand behind me.  Hey I'm 6'7"... DEAL!).  While it was weird not having Mike there, Sean was just as excited as I was to see the gig, so things were primed for a great evening and despite arriving there a bit too early THE SHOW WAS GREAT! The setting was a nice small pub so we were close but not right up front. Sean and I also had a good talk before Billy started to play, and we got to see Grant Showbiz, Billy's long time producer, there as well (I regret not asking for a picture with Grant)!!!! The crowd were all Bragg fans too, they knew the words to the songs, and they sang along.  Billy looked a bit tired (and with good reason, the dude travels a lot between gigs) but there was no evidence of weariness in his show.  The energy was full on, the songs made me happy, and even a bit emotional as so much of what this man does connects with my musical and political soul. He's had a great influence on my life in so many ways. And it's not just the music... he likes to talk between the songs and has great stories about everything from meeting the Queen to being part of a panel about Woody Guthrie with Pete Seger.  So I guess, through his music, and his little talks, Billy has always helped me make choices in life.  I don't think I'd know as much about The Smiths if Johnny Marr didn't help produce his album "Don't Try This At Home" and it's very possible my views on the labour movement may have remained indifferent if Billy's message hadn't made me look at it all a bit closer.  So in a sense, I feel like I owe this man a LOT.

After the show I wanted to buy some Billy Bragg swag... so as soon as the last lyric of "Waiting for the Great Leap Forward" was sung by Billy (and myself on back-up) Sean and I hustled over to the merchandise booth to meet Billy and buy some stuff!!!!  I checked out a shirt (sadly too short in length for my 6'7" frame so it was sent back) and I bought his new CD for the great man to sign. We were second in line to meet Billy and I gave Sean my camera to take a picture of us with the following instructions... "Don't FUCK IT UP!". As soon as I said that I saw Billy's roadie setting up a table for Billy to come out... and it was there I started to lose my shit.

Me and George!

Now I've met some great people who have influenced my life before like Marvel Comics creator Stan Lee, Spock himself Leonard Nimoy, even Sulu from Star Trek George Takei, and I handled myself pretty well with those guys. It was exciting, and I enjoyed a nice little talk with all of them!  But as I saw Billy's signing area being set up I started to feel something I've never felt before, I started to feel nervous.  I even turned to my Brother and said "I think I'm starting to freak out". I also started to feel my hands begin to shake a little. I looked down at them and you couldn't see them shaking but by god they were! I felt sweaty, like REALLY sweaty, like drops of sweat running down my face and getting into my eyes sweaty! I used my sleeve to soak up the torrent of liquid running down my brow.  At that point the one person in front of us turned and started talking to me, Sean said a few things to me too... but everything was turning into a bit of a haze. I was responding to them but it was with merely a nod or "uh-huh" accompanied by a 1,000 yard stare.

It's Stan the Man Lee!

Then Mr. Bragg walked out with a beer in one hand and a sharpie in the other, and started immediately talking to the lady in front of us. Numbness quickly overtook me and I could feel my body slowly shutting down. I had so much I wanted to say and ask... and he was right there.  The man who I had spent countless hours musically commiserating with over my broken heart, and raging over the injustices heaped upon us by the right wing upper class was there waiting to talk to me!!!!  I turned to Sean with a look that seemed to say "I don't know what the hell I'm doing" to which Sean gestured for me to turn around, as it was my time to meet "The Bard of Barking".

I walked up to Billy and I wish I could tell you exactly what happened but truthfully it's all a bit of a blur. I DO know that I started talking. I also know that is was mostly incoherent rambling.  I stumbled and bumbled not really making sense. I'm also pretty sure that Billy talked to me, but it was generally him being very nice and agreeing to my mumbling while most likely thinking "What the hell is this tall Canadian trying to say to me?". At some point I must have told him how to spell my name (Because he spelled it correctly on my newly purchased CD) but other than that? Fuck if I know. The majority of the meeting is a smear of a fuzzy memory. I'm sure in reality I only talked for 30 seconds or so, but it seemed like an eternity where the words continued to come out of my mouth yet failed to form any comprehensible whole. The haze does clear however near the end of our meeting, and the thing I remember saying to Billy with crystal clarity is the following phrase...

"mumble mumble...   Pop Sensibilities".

Billy signing my CD

POP SENSIBILITIES????  WHAT THE HELL DOES 'POP SENSIBILITIES' MEAN???? I wanted to die. There was a second where Billy looked at me quizzically then smiled and handed me my signed CD.  I turned and started to leave in a zombie like trance.  Luckily my Brother was there to stop me from walking away and asked Billy if he could get a picture of the two of us.  Billy was great, he hopped up and made sure Sean had the flash ready to go on the camera, it was almost as if he'd heard me tell Sean not to fuck it up earlier! One click and a blinding flash later, our moment was captured for the ages. Thanks to Sean taking the picture I gained enough clarity to shake Billy's hand look him in the eye and say "Thank You... Thank you for everything!". Billy smiled recognizing the slight moment of lucidity in our brief encounter. He said you're welcome back to me and turned to shake Sean's hand as well.

I was still shaking and in a bit of a haze as we walked out of the Royal pub in Nelson.  But that shaking soon turned into excitement as I had just met one of my biggest life influences and had the picture to prove it!  My Brother and I laughed at the state I was in, and I told Sean the only thing I remember is mumbling to him and saying the words"Pop Sensibilities".

Sean doubled over laughing...."What the hell does Pop Sensibilities mean?" he asked...

I don't know... and I still don't. But you know what? It doesn't matter, because even though I made zero sense to a guy I really admire, in the end, when I shook Billy's hand and thanked him I could tell he got it, and understood what I meant. He's been a guy who has been inspired by music too... he's poured over liner notes while listening to an album, he's had his heart broke and had someone else crystallize his feelings in song.  He's been where I am and understands what it's like. That's why I think so much of the man and his music.  He gets it.  Thanks Billy, Thanks for Everything...

"Pop Sensibilities" indeed...

I've never purchased alcohol for a minor BUT...

Where were you on September 23rd 2005? You don't remember do you? But really, why should you?  I did an extensive (extensive in this case being 3 minutes) Google search on this date and there wasn't much going on. Sure, it was the world premiere date of the TV show "The Ghost Whisperer" starring one of my ex wives Jennifer Love Hewitt. Green Day ruled the charts with the aptly titled "Wake Me Up When September Ends", and we were all reeling from the devastating resignation of the Italian Minister of Economy Domenico Siniscalco (I wept for days because of this). Exciting times to be sure, but I remember this day not for being able to once again to see Jennifer Love Hewitt's boobs bounce on the small screen, but rather more for the world cinematic premiere of George A. Romero's return to zombie films..."Land of the Dead".

Now if you don't know anything about George Romero and zombie movies just know this... he set up all the rules on what we know about zombies today. They are dead, they crave human flesh, the only thing that can stop them is to destroy their brain, and if you get bitten by a zombie you will die and become one of them! That's all you really need to know. I've been a big fan of Mr. Romero since I saw his flick "Dawn of the Dead" on betamax in my basement in the early 1980's. I was instantly fascinated by the notion of a society destroyed by the shambling undead!  This fascination never left even after Romero had made his last zombie film in 1984 and I still hoped beyond hope over the next 21 years he would make another one....and September 23rd 2005 he did!
I went to see "Land of the Dead" on it's first showing at 12:15pm that day at the Silver City Metrotown in Burnaby, BC. I went there thinking I would have a regular day at the movies, but little did I know I WOULD BREAK THE LAW!  Okay, breaking the law isn't accurate but I certainly got past some rules set down by the MPAA.


What did I do?  Well, I walked in to buy my ticket but all the automatic tellers are down that day so I stood there fumbling in my wallet to see if I had any cash to purchase my ticket to zombie goodness and snacks. As I stood there two teenage boys about 13-15 years of age approached me and asked me how I was doing. I said fine, as they looked around nervously, and then they asked me if I was alone. I started to think "Are these kids gonna  roll me and take my movie money?". But before I could run away in fear they cut to the chase... they asked me to go up to the box office and get them into the latest George A. Romero masterpiece!

They went on to explain how they can't get into a movie rated 18A without a parent or guardian. I couldn't help but smile! How could I say no? It's not like I was buying them crack (Which I'm pretty sure an adult can't do either) or the latest issue of "Swank". But I also couldn't just help these kids into the film if they were only looking to get out of school, NO! I wanted them to like Romero's films just like me.  So instead of simply getting them into the flick, I started to quiz them. I asked them what their fave movie was in the series, both answered "Dawn of the Dead".

"Remake or Original?" 

"Original??" they nervously replied....

I eyed them up and down suspiciously, and thought for a second. Okay, I was in. Let's do this! They actually offered to pay for me, which was really cool, but I just took the money for their tickets and we walked up to the box office.

"Three for the 12:15 of 'Land of the Dead' please." I said in the most parental guardian voice I could muster.

"Are you bringing these kids in with you?" The barely 18 herself box office attendant asked.

"Yeah, they are my little brothers" forgetting entirely the kids were Asian.

"Shouldn't they be in School?"

"Well, we aren't from around here..."

"You know this move is Rated 18A?"

"Very aware" (I was starting to get nervous)

"Are they over 18?"

At this point I thought we were done, but she was annoying me with her endless questions and the horrible way she kept snapping her gum. She couldn't keep these kids from witnessing this great directors vision! She would NOT keep us from seeing how the fourth film would further the socio-political subtext that George A. Romero had worked so hard for myself and my younger Asian looking brothers to see!!!!! I was no longer nervous, I was angry...

"Look, 'Joe Friday' just sell us the damn tickets" I snapped

The girl stared blankly at me for thirty seconds, probably confused why I called her Joe Friday, sighed, and printed off the tickets.

YES!!!  We did it!  I was actually excited that we'd BEATEN THE MAN!!!!!  I turned around ready to high five my new friends, talk about zombie flicks, and enjoy a great day of zombie heads being shot off!  But as I turned I noticed the kids had quickly grabbed their tickets and left...

"Thanks" they said over their shoulder as they walked away. For a second I was disappointed that I had lost my two new Asian brothers and our day of zombie fun. But that disappointment quickly turned to pride as I watched these young men walk away...I knew these guys would always remember the day I broke the law for their cinematic freedom!!!!!!

Oh by the way, despite what many say... I LOVED George A. Romero's "Land of the Dead". Beautifully filmed, exciting, gory as hell, all topped off with an amazing subtext about many things political and social.  If you get a chance to see it do so! And, if you need help getting in... just come see me!

How do I even do this anymore?

A long time ago I was a "Blogger".  Then I stopped. I told myself I would just take a break buuut it's been too long. I essentially gave it up. Now due to some good friends bugging me and some positive comments on some of my old posts I'm gonna give it another go.  I'm not 100% how to even post stuff here anymore!!!  But why have I been away you ask? No real firm answer here. I seem to lack any spark or inspiration that I once had, and maybe Twitter and Facebook received the little creative output I could muster, or maybe I was just lazy.  All of these things are probably true and I'm going to try and make it right by posting here at least once a month. Frankly, for me, that is a realistic goal.  Will I do it? I hope so.  I find living in a small town it's a bit harder to be as personal as I used to be on here, and getting my personal crap out was a lot of the reason I had the blog in the first place. Doesn't mean I won't talk about my personal life, but I will have to be a bit more careful on what I write about. I may talk about comics more, I may have more movie reviews, I dunno.  But right now, I just want to learn the ropes and see if I can actually write more than 150 characters at a time anymore.  Stick around, I will try not to disappoint!!!!

WOW I never thought this comic book would EVER be brought to film but this trailer is making me think differently... watch and let me know what you think!

Watchmen - Trailer

I like watching Birds!!!!

Apologies to my British readers ...I'm not talking about girl watching, but I have become a bit of a Bird (The ones with feathers) watching fan! It all started with me being sick with bronchitis and stuck on the couch for weeks. I looked out the window and thought it would be cool if I could get some quail or other crazy looking birds to show up on the lawn! Well I started with seed on the ground, and then a small feeder. Now I have an intricate bird sanctuary featuring multiple feeders, hunks of suet, and a bird bath.

Never would I have thought I'd be into this, but I am!

So far I've seen everything from Quail (Yes, they come every day now) to Ring Necked Pheasants (Pictured above). I have to say it's pretty cool and if I ever decide to own a camera I'll take some pics.... won't that be exciting?!!? My ultimate goal is to lure the elusive California Condor to my Lawn!! Sure they are endangered, and they don't exist anywhere near this part of the world. I understand all of that. But, I think with a little bit of patience and the right kind of meat to feed them with, I will have all 12 feet of their wingspan hanging out on the front lawn in NO time!!!! Okay maybe not....

As always hop on over to www.whatsupgf.com to see me making an ass out of myself, and email me anytime as I will try and get back to you right away! I reallywant to hear from you! Also you can add me on Facebook and Twitter. Talk to you guys soon!

Wow, I suck at updating this thing!

Hey there, Hi there, Ho there!!! Yes I suck for not keeping this thing up to date. I'm sorry, I really am. I guess a lot has changed since we talked last. I now work for Canada Post, and have been since December. And that's about it!

See why I haven't written much? Well I guess I could go on about a LOT more but things are really good, and I have pretty much put the Museum closure debacle behind me (It had NOTHING to do with me, I just worked there). I have to say that I'm really enjoying sorting mail, it pays well, and the people I work with are nice.

So let's recap the last few months or so...
- I'm still tall.
- I'm still being stalked on this blog by some anonymous commenter
- I am buying Comics at an alarming rate (No girls, it REALLY is cool to read comics)
- I'm on Facebook and now twitter (ADD ME)
- I smell faintly of Fried Bologna
- I'm still in Grand Forks and working for Canada Post
- I want to go to Spokane to watch some movies
- I am on a never ending quest to buy Steak-Umms! I'm sure somebody still sells them SOMEWHERE!!

Yeah, those are the highlights. Oh, I'm helping out a friend with his new website www.whatsupgf.com. Les (My friend) has just started this venture and we film little videos talking about the latest happenings in town. I'll keep doing that until he starts making money and can hire people a little more camera friendly then me! It's just in it's beta stage right now, and he's ironing out a lot of kinks, but take a look and don't laugh too hard at me on video.

I guess I do have more to say but I will wait and honestly try to update this bad boy at least once a week! *

And please, feel free to email me and tell me how you're doing! I love getting email!!

*no promises however.

Okay this has gone too long without an update!

I am amazed at how many people email me about how pissed off they are I've been AWOL from the old Bloggity Blog Blog! It really is nice to know people read it and want to read more. I'm sorry, and I am going to do my best to write regularly here. You can't really take a break from this thing or you'll just find it harder and harder to get back into it the longer you leave it!

A lot has been going on with my job as Administrator of the Boundary Museum that I just didn't want to talk about in such a public forum. Basically, the Society that pays me is locked out by the City of Grand Forks. Now I'm still being paid by the Boundary Museum Society... but how long will that go on? I don't really know.

So once again my life is thrown into uncertainty... and that adds a bit of anxiety to my everyday life I don't want. I'm actually holding up great despite the added pressure of (probably) facing unemployment again. But I hope things work out and I can go back to work soon. For more info go to the Boundary Museum Blog (Run by fellow Museum employee Les Johnson) here.

Oh and please feel free to email me or add me to your facebook! Can't wait to hear from you!

A very sad loss...

John Paul Federico passed away Friday after being sick for quite some time. For those of you who didn’t know John Paul, he was a classmate, and a friend of mine who had special needs. He came from an amazing family that, no doubt, was a huge part in John Paul becoming such a great man. I feel a great loss right now, but, (and I know it’s cliché to say) as long as we have our memories of JP he won’t ever really be gone.

It can be said that John Paul was arguably the most liked person in the entire city of Grand Forks. He was the kindest man I think I’ve ever known, and it wasn’t just because of his handicap, he had a genuinely gentle and loving soul. I feel very strongly had John Paul been born with all the advantages you and I have, I would still be writing these same things about him… he was truly a beautiful person.

One thing that always amazed me about JP was his incredible memory. He could recount things we had done in high School together that even I could no longer remember. Anytime I saw him, he’d say Hi, give me a hug, and ask how I was doing, and how my family was, then he’d ask if I am still living at the coast or wherever it was I had last told him I was living (He always got it right no matter how much time had past). When we finished talking he’d remind me to say hi to my family for him and carry on his way.

Shortly after I moved back to Grand Forks JP saw me and asked if I was still in Vancouver and I told him I had moved back here now. His eyes got wide and asked ‘Really?... that’s great Gregg!’ and then gave me a huge hug. I was extremely touched at how happy he was to have me back.

I work in the Boundary Museum where John Paul volunteered for well over 15 years and was loved by everyone who had ever worked here. John Paul cleaned the Museum every week and was a hard working person who could always be counted on to do a good Job in every room of our building….well, every room except for one. John Paul steadfastly refused to enter the women’s washroom to clean it. As John Paul said, he wasn’t a woman so he was NOT allowed to go in there!! You’ve got to appreciate a man who stands by his convictions!


The last time I saw John Paul was at his house not very long ago. He was very sick, jaundiced, tired, in a lot of pain, and looked so incredibly small. But all of those things didn’t keep his smile from beaming and his attitude upbeat and positive. I sat next to John Paul as he and his mom talked about an incident where he had got into a little trouble in school one day when someone remarked

‘I bet Gregg got in a lot of trouble in school too… right John Paul?”

John Paul shook his head and said

‘Nope, Gregg was always a good boy”.

As he said that, John Paul reached over, patted my leg, looked at me and smiled. That was one of the greatest compliments I will ever receive in my entire life and I certainly won’t forget that smile he gave me for as long as I live.

As I said earlier, John Paul is not really gone, he left behind far too much kindness, happiness, and love. And if you think of John Paul you will be filled with that kindness, happiness and love. And because John Paul can still make us feel that way without actually being here, is why he will never truly be gone.

Pics from the Penticton Elvis Festival....

Here is but a smattering of pics from the Elvis Festival a week and a bit ago. I'm quite sure we may see some more later on .... so here goes!!!

'Return to Sandor' is literally mobbed by women at a Beer Garden

Everywhere you turned you saw Elvii..

If people weren't watching there would have been a fight over the mike...

My dates for the weekend....

Two of my fave Elvis people.... Ben & Vanessa

We went to a house party filled with Elvii, and it was hosted by the man below. I'm a bit out of it in this picture (Drunk beyond all belief) plus this man had a grip on me so tight it could have been a WWF headlock.... it frightened me. Also look at Andrew (In the background) I think he's in love with the person who took this picture...

I'm sensing therapy in this kids future...

Here's how a lot of my time was spent .....

The Measham name lives on......

Great news from across the Pond.... this just in from cousin Bill Measham!!!!

"I would like to introduce Alec William Measham who was born at 17.54 on 27th June 2007 and weighed 9lb 5oz.

Alec was born nearly two weeks after his due date which meant that H had to be induced resulting in two days of extremely painful and uncomfortable labour. After an epidural and lots of pain relief it was evident that he could not be born naturally as he was facing forward and his head became stuck. His heart rate became a little erratic and so the consultant decided he would try forceps and after two contractions out he came. He and H had to stay in hospital until Saturday but are now home and fine."

So glad to hear baby Alec and Helena are doing fine, and it's good to know my second cousin will carry the Measham name on and beyond the 21st Century!!! Congatulations guys..can't wait to see Alec and family!

Elvis comes to the Okanagan....

... And I go to Elvis! Yes faithful blog readers I'm off tomorrow AM to take part in something I've been 'hounded' to go to since 2003!!! My good friend, and 'Elvis Tribute Artist' (ETA's for short), Sandor is taking part in the Penticton Pacific Northwest Elvis Festival and I'm going to hang out with him! I'm also going to meet a few old friends and other ETA's I befriended while living in Vancouver and serving on the board of the Official BC Elvis Fan Club!

These guys go to the festival, that is actually a competition, every year and they take it VERY seriously. I hope they all do well... So good luck goes out to Sandor, Brian, Terry, Adam, and of course Elvis Paul!!!! I will see you guys Friday night. Of course I don't need to tell you that women can't resist a guy in an Elvis suit, I just hope I can keep up.

Lots of fun should be had by all drinking, singing, and just catching up. I will try and update my blog with all sorts of pics and news from the weekend... WATCH THIS SPACE!

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention Sandor has the best Elvis stage name... "RETURN TO SANDOR" I love it!

Wrestling and baseball making for strange bedfellows

Word has it former MLB-player Warren Cromartie – a veteran of the former Montreal Expos now clocking in at 53 years-of-age – is set to make his in-ring professional wrestling debut on June 17th in Japan...



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You won't get this in Surrey.....

Last Friday I finally came to the realisation that I'm glad to be living in Grand Forks right now. Tell you why.... It's Friday night, and I'm heading into Overwaitea for a quick pick up of some food, which I figure will be a two minute stop. I walk in and right away I'm talking to one of the nicest guys in the world, Rick Rougeau, and his lovely wife Sabrina (Who is coincidently one of the nicest women in the world). We start talking and before I know it 10 minutes have gone by and as we start to say goodbye in walks one of my best friends (And T-Ball overlord) Brian McGraw, who I proceed to talk to and start to shop with. As Brian and I walk around the store we are greeted by familiar faces and smiles from all around. People I haven't seen in years coming over to shake my hand and are genuinely happy that I've moved back to the 'Land of Sunshine and Borscht'.

All in all, I think it took me an Hour to get my shopping done, which, by the way, consisted of Two comic books, A pizza, and a bag of Hershey kisses for those who want to know... yes, yes I am well aware that combo isn't exactly how Hugh Hefner spends his Friday nights. The smiling, the friendly faces, and the waving, was something that made me realise this is a great community, and I am really glad to be living here at this point in my life.

Hey quick Meat Draw update. I was shut out in my bid for a seventh consecutive meat win two saturdays ago, HOWEVER last Saturday I was back on a winning track as not only did I win more meat but I also claimed a $100.00 Pull tab prize as well! Not bad huh?

My meat streak....

No, the above title to this blog entry has nothing to do with me running around pantsless. It does however, refer to me having won meat 5 weeks in a row at the Grand Forks Legion Meat Draw. Now normally, I wouldn't crow about spending my Saturdays at the Legion gambling with Pensioners on hunks of Meat but I've won meat 5 freaking weeks in a row!

And not just any old hunk o' beef, but top grade stuff like a whole turkey! Yes, Yes, I know that's poultry, but please let's not get technical here, I'm on a streak baby! So this Saturday I walk into Branch 59 with my head held high, and Joe DiMaggio like assurance that the streak will continue. Should I win, and continue to win weeks after, I will provide lovely photos of all my meat winnings! Aren't you guys excited??

Now if the Legion only had some single ladies under the age of 54....

On coaching drunks...

Thanks to my good friend Brian McGraw I've been roped into coaching T-Ball. T-Ball are 4-6 year olds playing Baseball off of a, you guessed it, tee. At first I was just an emergency fill in coach, but that was 4 practices ago! I am now a full time coach for T-Ball commissioner Brian McGraw who rules over Tuesdays and Thursdays with an Iron thumb of learning and fun!

And I must say I am amazed at how fun it is! First off forget anything about actually coaching. It is more like you are in charge of 11 drunken midgets all doing their own thing.

"Okay Bobby, you stand here. And Lisa you go over t..... No Bobby back here buddy! Great, don't move! Now Lisa were gonna move yo...No Bobby don't climb that fence you go over here where I showed you, okay big guy? Now Lisa, you c... Bobby! Over here Pal!"

And it goes on like that for about 15 minutes, and then once you have them all set up, Commissioner McGraw signals it's time for them to do something completely different.

It is very rewarding, as the kids are always smiling and they get better every time out. Could do with more single Moms though...

Hey I bet you're all wondering when the big ceremonial induction dinner is for Legion Branch #59 right? Well you all have to come and see me become 'official', I'll take no excuses...

Saturday June 2nd
Legion Branch #59 in Grand Forks
Drinks start at 5pm sharp!
It's pot luck so please bring a pot or some luck.

One of the best....

I'm a lucky guy in the sense that I have a wonderful family who love and care for me. I'm even luckier that, in addition to a great family, I have not just one, but a handful of people I can call my 'best friend'. I may not have 3,417 friends on my myspace.com or facebook page but in real life my small handful are some of the greatest people you will ever find, and no amount of 'friendship' on myspace would equal what I have with these 'best friends'.

Sadly, my current life situation has caused me to not be there for one of my best friends. I'm hoping I can say a few things about the man here, as I won't get the chance later this month when Mike Ciccone strolls down the aisle to marry his lovely bride, Rebecca Hall, on May 20th. Shortly after Mike popped the question to Rebecca he asked me to be his Best Man, and for a time I said I would, but for several personal reasons, I had to bow out. Mike was understanding and gracious and I know he thinks no less of me. But it doesn't change the fact I feel like I've let him down somewhat, and I should be there for him. So, I'd like to share a few things about Mike that I would have done at the big wedding, had I been able to attend.

Not many people know this but Mike will not help you move. If you don't want Mike to show up someplace, just tell him there is moving involved and he will not darken your doorway until the coast is clear. Mike will balk at my claim, but I can verify this from several sources, those several sources being my brother Jim. I'm not sure why Mike avoids helping people move. I think there is something in his genetic make up that causes a stammering, yet bewildering, auditory defense when asked to put boxes in trucks. I liken it to an Octopus who squirts his ink to confuse his attacker, and then quietly slips away unscathed.

**TELEPHONE RINGS**
“Hello?”
“Hey Mike I need to move, can you help next Sunday?”
“Ahhh ....ummmm geeez,..... ahhh yeah I, uhhhh can't ummm make it, I.... ummm, have an appointment”
“You have an appointment on Sunday?”
“Yes. Gotta go!”
**Click!**

It's a phenomenon that must be investigated, but I fear much like the Sasquatch or the elusive Yeti, we will never truly understand it.

I can't actually remember the exact moment meeting Mike at BCIT in the fall of 1992. We were both taking Broadcast Communications (that's Radio for those not in the know) and I'm almost positive he was there from day one, but I can't say for sure because I didn't hear him speak until weeks after we'd been introduced. In fact, I know he barely spoke to anyone, until one day, when I was being my usual loudmouth self, no doubt trying to impress a girl in our class, and in my attempt I screwed up whatever it was I was trying to do. Mike spoke up with a quick and clever jab at my gaff that caused the whole class to laugh at my expense. I turned to him, sighed, and said.... “I liked it better when you didn't speak!”

Outside of me being a bit loud and Mike a bit quiet I quickly realised Mike and I were very much alike in many ways. Almost scary alike actually, to the point where I can't even recall ever seeing a movie with Mike, and disagreeing on what we thought of it (And we have gone to hundreds together). In fact to illustrate this point of like mindedness, there is a website called YMDB.com where you type in your all time top 20 favourite films, and then your list is compared with other people from all over the world giving you a top ten of whom you share the most movies in common with. Well, out of however many millions of people who had listed their favourite films on this site, I was amazed to see a Mike Ciccone from Abbotsford, BC clocking in at #3 on my top ten. What are the odds?

We became fast friends at BCIT sharing our love for movies, music, Baseball, David Letterman and many other forms of amusement far too nerdy to list here. Quickly we were teaming up writing gags, or 'bits' as we called them, for our radio shows, comedy routines, skits or whatever else popped into our heads. Later on in our lives we even made a movie together. The film had everything ... Mike wrestling a horrible Space Alien, Mike being electrocuted to death, Mike walking down the street with a tin foil space suit on, oh and there's also a scene where I have sex with a chair.... don't ask. Send me the right amount via paypal and I will post it on the internet....


I know in something like this you are supposed to have a few funny stories about your times together but to tell the truth there are sooo many things I can't even begin to pick just one thing. I mean we've done so much together where would I start? We've been to Las Vegas a few times, we've done day trips to Seattle, been all over small town BC, seen countless Vancouver Canadians games, Got locked in the Metrotown parking garage after hours and couldn't get out! We even shared season tickets to the Vancouver Grizzlies for all but one season of their short existence. In fact Mike and I met the nicest person ever at those games.

Our seats at GM Place were on the second level, dead center, two rows up, and we always sat next to the same lady (who it turned out was an African-American, motherly, ex-Californian police officer named Rena), we would share a nice smile at the beginning of the game with Rena, but pretty much ignore her when tip off rolled around. Well, a few weeks into the season listening to Mike and I talk Basketball, and deciding we actually knew what we were talking about, Rena turned to Mike and I and asked 'How the heck do two white boys from Canada know so much about Basketball?' We made sure our seats were next to Rena every season after.

Mike and I have so many running jokes and do them sooo often that we actually had to retire some because they were even making us sick. Somewhere in the ether of space hang banners of jokes worn out with over use. Lord knows how annoying they were to people around us. For instance Mike would call me up and ask what I'm doing, and I'd reply truthfully about the video game I happened to be playing ...

“I'm playing Ultima, it's where you have to get this magical sword to destroy an evil dragon that is killing everyone in the land”

Mike, without hesitation, would say “Wow that sounds like an awesome video game”

And on cue I'd reply... “Game?”.

Now you kind of understand why we 'retired' these things...

Despite the fact I now live far away I know Mike will still always be there for me. When I was diagnosed with a severe depression disorder some time ago, Mike would call and come over as much as he could, which wasn't easy, because by now he lived all the way out in Squamish. But, he'd still make the trek to my lovely downtown Surrey apartment to check in with me. He'd ask me where I needed to go, take me to the grocery store, then to the Comic Book shop (as he knew I liked my comics), buy us some pizza, watch a movie with me, and most important of all, listen to my problems. He didn't have to do this as he was seeing a pretty young thing named Rebecca at the time (Although I don't think I was yet allowed to tell anyone they were dating) and seeing me took away from his time with her. That's not easy to do when young love is blooming. I may not have seemed very appreciative at the time, as I was in a horrible state, but it meant a lot to me.

I can honestly say you'd be hard pressed to find a funnier, smarter, kinder or more loyal friend then Mike Ciccone. This is a man I look up to and respect, and I know Rebecca is well aware of how lucky she is so she doesn't need me to say it. I love him like my own brother. I know there isn't anything I wouldn't do for him as I know there is nothing he wouldn't do for me.... except help me move.

Good luck Mike and Rebecca, I wish I could be there to help celebrate your big day....

This one's for the ladies....

Getting many requests for pictures of me in my underwear from the female readers and I'm not one to disappoint the fairer sex. This Picture of me was taken last week... take it all in ladies!

This crazy thing called facebook the kids are all talking about...

So a week or so ago my good friend Mike Ciccone sends me an email and says "sign up to Facebook" nothing more, nothing less. I go to this Facebook website and since I tend to do most of what Mike says (Although a few times I've had to say 'NO that's just WRONG!') I start putting in my personal info and add that nice picture of handsome ol' me you see over there to your right.

When I'm all set up, it tells me to add a friend so I add Mike Ciccone, and Bada Bing, I see all of Mikes friends that, lo and behold, happen to be many of my friends also. Then I start typing in names from the past, and BOOM, here's an ex-girlfriend I haven't talked to in 16 years, BAM, here's my good friend Geoff who I lost contact with forever and a day ago and so on, and so on. And if that weren't cool enough, people who I hadn't yet looked up, start to find me first and ask ME to be added to their friends list.... people from High School, people from College, you get the picture.

So whats the point to all of this... well nothing really, but it's been very cool to talk to several people I haven't seen in years. And since I have a bit o' time on my hands here in the Forks I have set up several coffee dates with Facebook friends as they march on through Grand Forks during the summer. Oh, there is a caveat to Facebook, and thats while I have been lucky to find many friends from my past, the majority of people on the site were born after I graduated High School, but hopefully it will grow and more people remember to look me up! So what are you waiting for go and sign up, but don't forget to add me!

On what to do in a small town.....

Well I'm back here where I grew up, Grand Forks, BC. Now what do I do? Well, thats a question I have mulled over for the last two months... what exactly do you do in a small town? I'm not a young guy anymore so going off and hitting the bars every night is out. there's not a whole lot of single women here to chase. The movie theater isn't exactly up to THX standards, and there's only a handful of people I know that still live here (But it's a fantastic handful)... so what to do?

Well to start off I joined the Grand Forks Branch of the Royal Canadian Legion (Branch #59 if you are scoring at home). I think I may be the youngest member but you know, that's okay because it's actually kind of fun. I'm all official with an actual Legion membership card and everything (Okay, my name was spelled wrong but I'm used to that by now)! So far, the Saturday Meat Draw is the only event I take place in (Won BIG last Saturday!) but I have been told by the higher up's that they 'have plans' for me. What those plans are I have no idea. Every week I keep asking when all the hot single women will show up to the Legion lounge, but everyone just says "Ummm, that's next week Gregg' then they pat me on my head and send me on my way. I'll keep you posted on all my Legion goings on and also WATCH THIS SPACE for info on my induction ceremony and dinner. It's were I get sworn in and all that good stuff. All my friends and family are hereby ordered to attend.... Date and time will be coming soon!

One thing I miss about the big city are my weekly batch of new comics. Yes in this small town of GF our old comic book shop 'Landmark Comics & Gifts' dropped the comics part about 15 years ago and I have to rely on a random five or six issues on magazine racks once a month. When you are a nerd like me, this STINKS! When I was a kid the drug stores here had HUGE circular racks full of comic goodness...but alas no longer. In fact I only know of three or four places in GF that even carry comics anymore. Hey, if you live in the boundary country and know of a place that sells comics, email me and let me know where! Now, no doubt there are various mail order places on the internet, and when I get more settled I'll look into getting back into new comic goodness in that fashion. Until then however, I have to hunt and peck my way through drug store shelves for a gem here and there.

So other than comics and meat, I'm trying to keep busy by visiting the few people in town I still know, and I'm walking (almost) every morning with my Dad through this very pretty little city. I had forgotten how good the silence is. When you go for a walk and all you hear are birds, and maybe a slight breeze, you don't get that in Surrey.

So please, if you can, come visit or call me. I have a new phone number and email. Drop me a line HERE , say hello and I'll give you the digits. WORD!

Crap I almost forgot...... before I go I want to say a very late congratulations to my good friend Marlies Dick (See pic below) who at the age of, well let's just say, just over 40, has become a Constable in the RCMP. It's hard enough to do it when you are a young whipper snapper, but to do it when you are a little older (NO, Marlies I'm not calling you old), have 4 kids, and a demanding husband is simply unheard of. I am sooo proud of Marlies. The RCMP just got a good person and it looks a little prettier now too! Way to go!